Children grow up surrounded by technology and screens. To help your kids develop a healthy relationship with media early on, try some of these fun skill-building activities from the American Academy of Pediatrics Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health.
To print these out as activity cards for your family to use, go
here.
Setting up for "us" time
Set up device-free
dinners or device-free
zones in your home. Have a basket or box where phones, tablets and other devices go to be quiet for a while. If you feel like being crafty, ask your child help make or decorate the device "rest" bag or box. When your devices are in there, explain that do this so you can focus just on them and the things you want to do or
play together.
Family movie night
Plan a
family movie night. You can have your child pick something or watch something you loved from your childhood. Or, if your child likes to watch a streaming series, ask to join them for an episode or two. Resist picking up your phone!
Ask your child:
what they like about the movie/show and characters.
what they think is going to happen next in the plot.
how the movie/show makes them feel (happy/sad/excited/nervous/etc.)
Technology that's hard to put down
Take turns looking at your "screen time" reports in your device
settings. Talk about what you usually do on your device and whether it brings you joy or stress. Ask kids which apps and games are hardest to put down. Also ask which ones let them feel like they are easily in control.
YouTube together time
Watch a YouTube video
together (anything you find appropriate or perhaps your child's favorite channel). Talk about the
ads that pop up and what they mean. Then talk about the recommended videos that show up. Encourage good choices, and see what your child wants to click on. Discuss what you think is
appropriate video content, and what is not.
Our family's non-tech favorites
Pick a board game you want to play, a song you want to
dance to, an
art activity that makes you feel good, an
outdoor place you want to visit, or a
pet you want to snuggle. Each family's non-tech favorites are different, so find a few that work for you and make them a regular
routine.
How we manage emotions
What's your family's emotion coping plan? How do you each like to deal with
stress or upsetting feelings? Find healthy ways to cope that feel right for your family, like movement (stretching, taking a
walk), using your senses (music, hugging, stress putty),
deep breathing, or talking about your feelings without yelling.
Choosing the good stuff: a ratings game
Talk with your child about what type of channels/shows they watch or what digital games they play. Play a quiz game where you rate each video or game on a scale of 1 to 5 on qualities like:
I use my brain when I watch this (vs. my brain turns off when I watch this).
The people are kind (vs. the people are rude).
I feel good about myself when I watch this (vs. I feel worse about myself when I watch this).
This feels like our family (vs. this feels unrealistic).
How technology makes us feel
Both parents and kids, think about what apps or games you use the most. How do they make you feel during and after using them? Good? Cranky? Riled up? Worried? Maybe take a break from the ones that don't make you feel good.
Digital disengage challenge
This is a family challenge to put your devices down! It's hard to pull your attention away. But you can make a game of it when it's time to turn it off, hand over the device, or put it away when it's time to do something else.
Count up points when family members can put their device down the first time someone asks them. The person with the most self-control points at the end of the week wins!
Scam finder
Talk about the types of scams you've seen lately. Spam phone calls? Too-good-to-be-true advertisements? An influencer saying something odd or questionable? This helps your child build a critical eye.
Pop-up ad whack-a-mole
If your child is watching videos or playing a mobile game, teach them to close, "X" or "skip" the ad. Ask them to let you know when they did it! Have them help you figure out which apps or games have the most annoying pop-ups, uninstall them and find fun alternatives.
Weird or creepy content
Ask your child to tell you about the weirdest or creepiest thing that they've seen online lately. Don't overreact! Help them understand what it was, why it showed up and how to avoid it next time.
Private vs. shareable information
Quiz your child on what is private and what is OK for them to share. Their last name? Address? School name? Phone number? Hometown? Password? All private! Their high score? Favorite game? OK to share!
Family photos: to post or not to post
Do you regularly post photos of your children? If so, sit down and go through your social media feed with them. Ask them to rate your posts—from recent to when they were just babies—with one of three responses:
You don't need to necessarily take photos down, but listen to your kids with an open mind. Let them tell you why they wish those photos stayed on your phone, and not on the internet.
Offline family photo album
Instead of posting photos online, select a few that are special to your family. Then, print out and put in an album in your home. Have your children help pick out the ones that give them the best memories and help arrange them in the album. Keep the album in an easy-to-reach place so that kids can look through it during downtime (rather than grabbing a device!).
Chat etiquette
If your child uses a video game or video platform that allows chatting and comments, have them show you what it looks like. Look at the chat together and talk about:
You can also help them restrict their chat to "friends" online, or try turning off the chat for a week or two. Some kids don't miss it!
More information
Developed in partnership with the Kids Online Health and Safety Task Force, which is co-led by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, through the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, in close partnership with the U.S. Department of Commerce. Funding for the Center of Excellence was made possible by Grant No. SM087180 from SAMHSA of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS). The contents are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily represent the official views of, nor an endorsement by, SAMHSA/HHS or the U.S. Government.